The Week in Yeah is Emerald Miasma's weekly round-up of the good, the bad, and the incomprehensible of pop culture, the world at large, and life in general, as seen by me
It's been a second since I have updated things here (thanks to my stunning consistent employment), so there's a lot to talk about. First and foremost, Halloween just ended, and now all of us brooding misanthropes are stuck in the post-Halloween hangover period from now until Thanksgiving, the holiday of the damned. I say hangover period both figuratively and literally, as I got cripplingly drunk and may have forever shifted my body's pH balance in the process.
I dressed up for Halloween, as I want to be a good sport, but keeping in the spirit of not being 'that dude', I did so in a manner that befits a non-asshole in their mid-20's: half-assed, cheaply, and only slightly clever. I went as Freddy Krueger because I have the shirt and hat, and I have access to plastic knives that won't poke me if and when I forget I have them on and try to chug a bottle of Yuengling. I did this mostly because going overboard for Halloween is never a good idea. Oh, you might think that everyone's going to fawn over you and drown you in compliments and willing genitals, but that's never the case. I've seen dozens of cosplaying Etsy Queen wannabes that are forced to stand all night, because their Marie Antoinette costume doesn't allow them to sit down without turning the inside of the dress into that scene from 'Suspiria' where that screamy woman falls into a barbed wire pit. All the girls in the super-revealing sexy costumes are going to be whining for coats 10 minutes into the party. Your latex scars will itch, your fun character props will get snagged in door jams, and the whole thing will only cost about $150.
This is why the best costume is always gorilla suit, no gorilla head, and one of those beer helmets. You're warm, you're festive, you have a veritable IV of alcohol at mouth level, and you can just piss in the costume and no one's going to notice in all likelihood. It's like the hospice care of Halloween costumes.
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Netflix had a pretty terrible horror movie selection on Watch Instant leading up to Halloween, which bummed me out a lot. But, they did have 'TNT Jackson' on Watch Instant recently, so it still manages to prove its worth (barely). 'TNT Jackson' is a kung-fu Blaxploitation movie starring former playmate Jeannie Bell and co-written by DICK FUCKING MILLER. The film follows the titular character through the Hong Kong underground on a search to find her brother, kicking ass all the while. The film has a lot of moderately acceptable kung-fu from Bell, who was never trained in martial arts, but was billed as the two-time Ebony Fist award winner, even though the award was completely made up by B-Movie Svengali Roger Corman. It's action packed, Bell is foxy as fuck, and the film is incredibly short. It's a perfect set up for a solid C-Movie.
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Netflix had a pretty terrible horror movie selection on Watch Instant leading up to Halloween, which bummed me out a lot. But, they did have 'TNT Jackson' on Watch Instant recently, so it still manages to prove its worth (barely). 'TNT Jackson' is a kung-fu Blaxploitation movie starring former playmate Jeannie Bell and co-written by DICK FUCKING MILLER. The film follows the titular character through the Hong Kong underground on a search to find her brother, kicking ass all the while. The film has a lot of moderately acceptable kung-fu from Bell, who was never trained in martial arts, but was billed as the two-time Ebony Fist award winner, even though the award was completely made up by B-Movie Svengali Roger Corman. It's action packed, Bell is foxy as fuck, and the film is incredibly short. It's a perfect set up for a solid C-Movie.
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I've been watching a lot of 'River Monsters' on Netflix as well (maybe it's paying off more than I first anticipated). 'River Monsters' is a show where a British dude named Jeremy Wade goes around the world to fish for the biggest, scariest, and most dangerous freshwater fish. That's about it. A man fishing for scary fish. BUUUUUUUT, the show is still fascinating. Wade is a very intriguing dude, with some odd, unexplained back story that makes him seem like some kind of international spy. Each episode follows a similar path: Wade reads a story of someone swimming in a terrifying river that was eaten, he flies there, talks to some natives, catches some lesser scary fish, undergoes some kind of local blessing, catches the scary fish (although, to be fair, not always), and then releases the fish and decides whether or not the fish could kill someone.
Normally, I fear no fish. Fish are dumb, and I could just punch most of them and they'd swim away an chew on an aquatic plant. But, some of these fish are FUCKING TERRIFYING. There's a catfish called the Wels Catfish that can get up to 800 pounds in Spain. Again, this is in a fucking river. That shit could 86 your ass in no time. There's another fish in the Amazon called the Arapaima that launches itself like a missile out of the water if it gets cornered and it's like the size of a scuba tank. This show has taught me many things. Mongolia is beautifully terrifying and full of bandits, the Amazon is a death trap, the Congo River is easily the most horrifying river to ever be a river, and I actually owned one of these fish at one point in my life.
The Pacu is a vegetarian relative of the piranha, and has killed people in Papua New Guinea or something by BITING OFF DICKS. I owned a dick biting fish for like four years in my little tropical fish tank as a child. The fucking thing got so big that we had to bury it in the backyard when it died. Dick biting fish should not be allowed in a household fish tank. Dick biting fish should not even be allowed IN THE WILD. PetCo should be held accountable for all the potential dicks lost to these nightmare fish with a clear grudge against humanity.
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I've been watching a lot of 'River Monsters' on Netflix as well (maybe it's paying off more than I first anticipated). 'River Monsters' is a show where a British dude named Jeremy Wade goes around the world to fish for the biggest, scariest, and most dangerous freshwater fish. That's about it. A man fishing for scary fish. BUUUUUUUT, the show is still fascinating. Wade is a very intriguing dude, with some odd, unexplained back story that makes him seem like some kind of international spy. Each episode follows a similar path: Wade reads a story of someone swimming in a terrifying river that was eaten, he flies there, talks to some natives, catches some lesser scary fish, undergoes some kind of local blessing, catches the scary fish (although, to be fair, not always), and then releases the fish and decides whether or not the fish could kill someone.
Normally, I fear no fish. Fish are dumb, and I could just punch most of them and they'd swim away an chew on an aquatic plant. But, some of these fish are FUCKING TERRIFYING. There's a catfish called the Wels Catfish that can get up to 800 pounds in Spain. Again, this is in a fucking river. That shit could 86 your ass in no time. There's another fish in the Amazon called the Arapaima that launches itself like a missile out of the water if it gets cornered and it's like the size of a scuba tank. This show has taught me many things. Mongolia is beautifully terrifying and full of bandits, the Amazon is a death trap, the Congo River is easily the most horrifying river to ever be a river, and I actually owned one of these fish at one point in my life.
The Pacu is a vegetarian relative of the piranha, and has killed people in Papua New Guinea or something by BITING OFF DICKS. I owned a dick biting fish for like four years in my little tropical fish tank as a child. The fucking thing got so big that we had to bury it in the backyard when it died. Dick biting fish should not be allowed in a household fish tank. Dick biting fish should not even be allowed IN THE WILD. PetCo should be held accountable for all the potential dicks lost to these nightmare fish with a clear grudge against humanity.
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It took 15 years, but I finally broke ONE MILLION points in 'Tony Hawk: Pro Skater'. I await your inevitable forthcoming praise.
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BROWNS NEWS! The Browns win! They have defeated the Baltimore Ravens for the first time in eleven games. Davone Bess redeems himself in a huge way after the disaster that was the Chiefs game. Jason Campbell continues to be the anti-Weeden. Buster Skrine is becoming an excellent cornerback, which I would have NEVER seen coming. The Browns are now 4-5, and are looking up. They're even in the playoff hunt as of right now. All in all, I am excited about the rest of this season. 11-5 starts today!
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It took 15 years, but I finally broke ONE MILLION points in 'Tony Hawk: Pro Skater'. I await your inevitable forthcoming praise.
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BROWNS NEWS! The Browns win! They have defeated the Baltimore Ravens for the first time in eleven games. Davone Bess redeems himself in a huge way after the disaster that was the Chiefs game. Jason Campbell continues to be the anti-Weeden. Buster Skrine is becoming an excellent cornerback, which I would have NEVER seen coming. The Browns are now 4-5, and are looking up. They're even in the playoff hunt as of right now. All in all, I am excited about the rest of this season. 11-5 starts today!
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FANTASY FOOTBALL UPDATE! Week 9 has just ended, and I am still currently in SECOND PLACE. Now, I did lose this week, and I currently sit at 5-4, and I am technically tied with two other dudes in my division, and if I were in the other division I would be in 7th place, and Arian Foster is hurt, and I can't trade RG3 away to anybody, and I only have 3 running backs on my entire roster, and I'm definitely going to lose to my brother this week, and I'm probably going to limp into the playoffs, but hey, SECOND PLACE!!!!! FUCK ALL Y'ALL FOR THIS VERY SHORT PERIOD OF TIME!
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PODCAST NEWS! Lots to get to here. First and foremost, 'The Best Show on WFMU' is ending after 13 years in December. I cannot express my sadness about this, and I'll probably dedicate a much larger piece to this news closer towards the end of it's run. But, that said, my heart hurts from the news. I wish the best of luck going forward not just to Tom Scharpling, Jon Wurster, and Mike Lisk, but to anyone that has helped make 'The Best Show' one of the most meaningful programs I have ever been thankful enough to listen to. Seven more weeks. I'm sure they will be as incredible as always
On to some lighter subject matter, 'James Bonding' is a podcast with Matt Mira of 'The Nerdist' and Matt Gourley of 'Superego' where they dissect each of the Bond films with a guest, and I cannot recommend this enough. First off, any time I get to hear Matt Gourley talk is a treasure. Gourley is such a sweet man with such a twisted mind. He manipulates language like few people in comedy today. It's also good to hear Matt Mira without Jonah Ray constantly cutting him down or cutting him off (I like Jonah, but still) or Chris Hardwick doing his nonsense Ryan Secrest-esque dance of nerd neutrality and baseless positivity. Mira can really shine when he's not needlessly encumbered. The show is very thorough and the two Matts clearly know what they're talking about. It also reminded me of the goddamn 'Die Another Day' song Madonna did, and that really is one of the worst songs I have ever heard. So, thanks? Definitely worth checking out.
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FANTASY FOOTBALL UPDATE! Week 9 has just ended, and I am still currently in SECOND PLACE. Now, I did lose this week, and I currently sit at 5-4, and I am technically tied with two other dudes in my division, and if I were in the other division I would be in 7th place, and Arian Foster is hurt, and I can't trade RG3 away to anybody, and I only have 3 running backs on my entire roster, and I'm definitely going to lose to my brother this week, and I'm probably going to limp into the playoffs, but hey, SECOND PLACE!!!!! FUCK ALL Y'ALL FOR THIS VERY SHORT PERIOD OF TIME!
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PODCAST NEWS! Lots to get to here. First and foremost, 'The Best Show on WFMU' is ending after 13 years in December. I cannot express my sadness about this, and I'll probably dedicate a much larger piece to this news closer towards the end of it's run. But, that said, my heart hurts from the news. I wish the best of luck going forward not just to Tom Scharpling, Jon Wurster, and Mike Lisk, but to anyone that has helped make 'The Best Show' one of the most meaningful programs I have ever been thankful enough to listen to. Seven more weeks. I'm sure they will be as incredible as always
On to some lighter subject matter, 'James Bonding' is a podcast with Matt Mira of 'The Nerdist' and Matt Gourley of 'Superego' where they dissect each of the Bond films with a guest, and I cannot recommend this enough. First off, any time I get to hear Matt Gourley talk is a treasure. Gourley is such a sweet man with such a twisted mind. He manipulates language like few people in comedy today. It's also good to hear Matt Mira without Jonah Ray constantly cutting him down or cutting him off (I like Jonah, but still) or Chris Hardwick doing his nonsense Ryan Secrest-esque dance of nerd neutrality and baseless positivity. Mira can really shine when he's not needlessly encumbered. The show is very thorough and the two Matts clearly know what they're talking about. It also reminded me of the goddamn 'Die Another Day' song Madonna did, and that really is one of the worst songs I have ever heard. So, thanks? Definitely worth checking out.
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MUSIC! The new Future of the Left album 'How to Stop Your Brain in an Accident' is fucking excellent. It's probably Andy Falkous at his most vitriolic, which is really saying something considering its source. Lines like 'But now he knows the truth about her former life/ She'll be passed around at parties in his sleep' are commonplace. This also the most adventurous the band has been since the Mclusky days, breaking their standard neo-punk sound up with pianos and acoustic guitars on occasion. Seriously, if you don't know about Future of the Left, get the fuck on it.
From the excellent Burger Records comes the second album from Peach Kelli Pop. PKP is a lady songwriter with a strong sunny pop core, but some pretty aggressive guitars complimenting the cheeriness. She reminds me a bit like The Pipettes, but with a heavy 90's indie rock influence. It's a very pretty album, with enough underlying darkness to keep the agro prick in me satiated. Very cool stuff.
If you're looking for some good atmospheric black metal-ish type music, the new album 'The Feral Kingdom' by Wormlust is pretty good. There's nothing too groundbreaking, but it's executed well and there are some great ambient stretches on here. It also feels like an ALBUM. Everything flows very well together, and it gets better with every listen, which a lot of metal albums recently have been lacking for me. Good stuff.
Also, I've talked a bit about these releases already, but the new Queens of the Stone Age album '... Like Clockwork' is spectacular, Robedoor's 'Primal Sphere' is easily their best album yet, and 'Joy One Mile' by Stellar Om Source is simply stunning. Also, the new albums from Naam, Zomes, and Warm Soda are also pretty good. Something not good? The new Sleigh Bells. I think I'm pretty much done with Sleigh Bells. I can't really be upset, as the set-up of the band was doomed to entropy from Day One. They produced one really great album, which is more than they had any right to make, but the last two have been really disappointing. But that's neither here nor there. This is still shaping up to be a great year for music.
MUSIC! The new Future of the Left album 'How to Stop Your Brain in an Accident' is fucking excellent. It's probably Andy Falkous at his most vitriolic, which is really saying something considering its source. Lines like 'But now he knows the truth about her former life/ She'll be passed around at parties in his sleep' are commonplace. This also the most adventurous the band has been since the Mclusky days, breaking their standard neo-punk sound up with pianos and acoustic guitars on occasion. Seriously, if you don't know about Future of the Left, get the fuck on it.
From the excellent Burger Records comes the second album from Peach Kelli Pop. PKP is a lady songwriter with a strong sunny pop core, but some pretty aggressive guitars complimenting the cheeriness. She reminds me a bit like The Pipettes, but with a heavy 90's indie rock influence. It's a very pretty album, with enough underlying darkness to keep the agro prick in me satiated. Very cool stuff.
If you're looking for some good atmospheric black metal-ish type music, the new album 'The Feral Kingdom' by Wormlust is pretty good. There's nothing too groundbreaking, but it's executed well and there are some great ambient stretches on here. It also feels like an ALBUM. Everything flows very well together, and it gets better with every listen, which a lot of metal albums recently have been lacking for me. Good stuff.
Also, I've talked a bit about these releases already, but the new Queens of the Stone Age album '... Like Clockwork' is spectacular, Robedoor's 'Primal Sphere' is easily their best album yet, and 'Joy One Mile' by Stellar Om Source is simply stunning. Also, the new albums from Naam, Zomes, and Warm Soda are also pretty good. Something not good? The new Sleigh Bells. I think I'm pretty much done with Sleigh Bells. I can't really be upset, as the set-up of the band was doomed to entropy from Day One. They produced one really great album, which is more than they had any right to make, but the last two have been really disappointing. But that's neither here nor there. This is still shaping up to be a great year for music.
